Have they noticed?
Something is happening.
Something is stirring.
Something enormous and dark.
Has anyone noticed?
A little more withdrawn?
A little more reserved?
A little unsure?
A little distracted?
Throw yourself into each menial task.
Everything is fine… nobody knows.
You are waiting for it to happen,
but what is it?!
Some terrible forgotten secret?
Some horrific monster from the past,
waiting to ambush you.
You have repressed your horrors before,
Will it come as you sleep?
Will this pass quietly over you,
until you feel normal again?
Or will you crack open,
in front of everyone.
Will you scream at them,
Listen to me!! I am suffering!!
But you have become so skilled in hiding your feelings.
How could you expect them to notice?
The master of displaying as an open book,
whilst hiding everything that you are.
Clutching your chaos to your chest,
as if it were something precious.
Does anyone really know you?
And how can you explain your condition,
when you don’t even understand
why you suffer so.
You are holding in your passion.
You are grappling at your emotions.
Clinging in desperation,
to prevent them from being seen.
Like trying to hold a swarm of bees in a hive.
Like trying to hold the ocean in your hands.
You are tiny, insignificant.
And what does your pain even matter?
When there are so many like you.
If only you could silence your mind,
for just half an hour.
© no face woman