High Energy

There were too many today.
Too many people.
Too many voices.
‘Crashing in,
 into my little world’

One stressed.
One emotional.
One too busy.
One had a rough morning.
One unabashedly tactless.

Too many people.
Too many emotions,
for an empath
to handle.

For we are the ones
who see all.
We are the ones,
who pick up
on all of your emotions.

As they collect above your heads,
gathering in the air.
A thick fog,
glass shards,
raining through the atmosphere,
hitting us
like a thousand bullets.

And we jump tirelessly
from one to the other.
Asking how you are feeling,
seeking to help you,
if we can.

We hear your words, yes,
but your emotions are louder,
deafening, almost.

We hear when you pretend.
We know when you are faking a smile.
We feel every pin prick.

We absorb every sound.
Every nuance.
Every subtle glance,
between those around us.

And sometimes,
this sensitivity is overwhelming.

Sometimes, we leave
unable to cope
with the thought of
another interaction.

We sit on public transport
in silence.
Headphones in,
trying to drown out
the noise of any more conversation.
Because just one more
absorbed feeling
could push us over the edge.

But despite our apparent exhaustion.
Our tiring, of conversations
that aren’t necessary,
most of the time…

We care.
Oh how we care so.
We want to save you all.

And today,
instead of silencing the noise
with alcohol,
(like we normally might),
we sang our chaos away.

And it worked!

 

 

no face woman © 2017

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38 Comments

        1. Me too, perhaps only in the last 3-5 months have I recognised my need for silence and solitude. Socialising used to be a method of distraction… but now (in the awakening of self preservation) it’s essential to avoid it for the most part !

          Liked by 2 people

          1. That’s very interesting as it’s getting similar for me: before Christmas I socialised at very opportunity I could (“gimme distraction”) but I’m getting more selective now, and it definitely suits my mood better. 🙂

            Liked by 1 person

          2. Me too absolutely… I hadn’t realised that I’d been distracting myself for over ten years by making so many social plans. Now I’m pretty much off the radar.. but I prefer it. I’m glad it’s suiting you too 🙂

            Liked by 1 person

          1. How low can you go? 😅 love the old school. Back when I could really eat shit that would make a billy goat puke. Still could… not often necessary having been there and done it. The tide is turning. As we hang tough and true we remember those we love who got us here and can never leave us. The ghost dance can be heard outside the camps

            Liked by 1 person

          2. Same with my medical team. They tell me I am probably the most sane and mentally disciplined man in the nation…. I am just going along as I have for all predecessors… I can probably outlive everyone making coin in the mental health system from the shit end of the stick… without ever committing a criminal act. The higher ranked the medical officers are the more they wish they had have partied with Holden Caulfield when he got booted out. Lol. I know they say a Leo loves being praised… not sure though. My mother used to refer to me as anamalistic pig shit bastard and then I got enlightened arguing with an adult about wishing I weren’t born and how that would actually work. We wake up one day on the healing ground and have that Jackie Chan moment… where I exclaimed DAMN!!! I AM A GOOD FIGHTER 😅

            Liked by 1 person

          3. As a very small child I understood how the world treats female alcoholics, the fear of women, and what assholes misogynistic males are and how sneaky they are in broad daylight

            Liked by 1 person

          4. They are nasty to men like me who won’t join them. Alcohol and drugs are what they rely on. Common bullying. Political pigs.

            Liked by 1 person

          5. Yes! My other half always refers to himself (jokingly) as a ‘beta male’ , because he can’t get on board with how some men behave towards women. I respect that attitude in a man. Here’s to you for not joining them!

            Liked by 1 person

  1. When my PTSD gets really bad singing is the one thing that really helps. My nights aren’t so bad now but I used to spend up to 2 hours awake and at those times I would sing a loving song or inspiring song to myself. I also related to being so saturated with others feelings, its better when we spend more time alone.

    Liked by 1 person

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