Cowardice

And you,
who is twice the size
of her.

You who lied.
You, who manipulated
everyone around you.

You, who strides with confidence.
The odour of feigned arrogance
following you, even when you’ve left the room.
You, who dismisses those you have hurt,
as if they were the perpetrator.

You treat her
as if you never met.
As if you never
summoned hell from the depths
and brought it
screaming and rushing
into her life.

She was still so young.
Didn’t you know
of her naivety?

Of course you did.
That is why you chose her.

And when she returned,
through circumstance, rather than choice.
You found yourself in her presence again.

And you.
What did you decide to do
With the time you had to reflect?
You did NOTHING
but feel sorry for yourself,
didn’t you?

And what did she do?
She has built her own internal army.
She has learnt,
that your abuse
is a reflection on yourself,
not on her.

She has learnt, that a weak man
will always seek to blame
his victim.

And when she summoned all her strength,
to raise her head,
to look you in the eye
and to say hello.
With genuine kindness.
Genuine forgiveness.
What did you do then?

You quivered with fear.
You fixed your ugly mask in place.
The mask that nobody ever sees beneath.
Because you,
you know,
that underneath your facade,
there is nothing but soil and earth.
Writhing self hatred,
wretchedness.

And you have brought all of this
upon yourself.
Through your selfish,
indignant behaviour.

She feels sorry for you now.
She is strong.
She is loved.
She would forgive you willingly,
but you,
You are still too cowardly
to simply say;

“I was wrong, and I’m sorry”.

 

 

no face woman © 2017

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